Cereal Killer

In Monday's musings about stay-at-home life I mentioned I eat Grape Nuts cereal. This led to a thread in the comments section about Grape Nuts. Apparently, a lot of you are not fans. I was surprised to learn (thanks to a JEOPARDY question) that C.W. Post invented Grape Nuts in 1894. Since they’re still around I can’t be the only one who doesn't consider them gravel.

But it got me to thinking of breakfast cereals in general.

Cereal played a big part in my diet growing up. As a kid, my mom would make a big breakfast (bacon & eggs, or pancakes, or waffles) on Sunday mornings. Every other day breakfast consisted of cereal and milk.

From the time I was maybe 5 until 12 my cereal of choice was based solely on what toy they were offering. Back then you could send in two box tops and fifty cents and get a plastic Munchy, Crunchy, or Spoon Size to fit on your spoon (the space men characters from Nabisco’s Shredded Wheat Juniors – a truly horrible cereal).

I sent away for a lot of that junk. I think the big thrill was not playing with the toys, but the rush of seeing them actually arrive in the mailbox. The anticipation was agony for this 6 year-old.

Back then cereal companies would sponsor kid shows, usually on Saturday mornings. Kellogg’s sponsored THE ADVENTURES OF SUPERMAN. I sent away for a lot of crap to Battle Creek, Michigan. There were a number of cheesy cartoon shows sponsored by Post (e.g. LINUS THE LIONHEARTED). MIGHTY MOUSE on CBS was sponsored by Ipana toothpaste. I always found that ironic amidst the plethora of sugar-coated teeth-rotting cereals.

Once I reached the mature age of maybe 12 my cereal habits became binges. I’d eat Special K every day for several years, then switch to Rice Chex, Raisin Brand, Cheerios, and Grape Nuts for extended periods each. (Corn Flakes never did it for me, neither did Rice Krispies, Trix, Kix, or Wheaties – I was never going to be a champion so why bother?)

I got out of the habit of eating cereal until this pandemic. Now I’ve settled into a routine and that includes cereal for breakfast. My current jag is Grape Nuts. When I’m eating it I start to feel a little nostalgic. It’s almost like I’m a kid again – until I finish and then realize I can’t go out and play.

from By Ken Levine

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